is has been a year that change is the new icon. Will the battle cry be enough? Our nation has been noticing the signs, but still spiraling out of control. We're like a bunch of spoiled children waiting for the next handout, all the while bad mouthing the giver. When the banks tried to withhold loans, because they didn't meet the criteria-they were sued. After the first win, all other banks had to follow suit or be sued. It no longer mattered whether they had the ability to pay back the loan, we have to be fair and allow all to have what they ask. Other nations need our financial assistance which we freely give, all the while they bad mouth the giver with their hands still open for the giving. Now that our economic stability or instability is out in the open, we're all disturbed. Once the bailout was approved for one, the line is increasing daily of those with hands out for their share of the spoils. When does the noble act of giving become an act of enabling even crippling those around us?
I just finished my first week back to school, and 1 thought kept popping up in my cluttered head. What did I do on my summer break? Every day was jam packed, but in the retelling (which everyone was sharing their summer adventures last week) lost some of the appeal. June and most of July, I was still in recovery mode from my shoulder and bicep surgery. The first week of July, I was able to start doing 2 sessions of my home therapy instead of the 4 times a day I had been doing since the surgery in March. Also, I wouldn't have to go back to the therapist unless I encountered problems. Talk about feeling freedom. I hardly knew where to begin, and it was difficult to get back into the mindset of having free time.
Going through old photos, I found this one of the girls, and what memories came flooding back. After repeatedly telling the twins to stay out of the mud puddles, because I didn't want them to get their clothes and shoes muddy, this was their solution. I looked out of the kitchen window to this. Their clothes and shoes in little piles on the driveway, and them rolling in the mud. Their white hair was streaked with mud, and their sisters, Chrissy and Anita, were trying to coax them to get out while remaining mud free themselves. Too bad it's so faded, but the memory is as vivid as ever.
Once upon a time...well, actually it was December 16th, 2005, and I was eager to get to school to finish up our last day of the book fair. Of course, the weather was similar to what we've had recently with snow, ice, melting, freezing, and more snow on top. When I arrived at the parking lot in my usual spot, I hurried to grab all my bags and be on my way. As soon as my feet hit the pavement, down I went on my elbow and right side until I finally slid into the wheel of my car stopping me. I was positive my arm was broken at my elbow, it hurt so badly. Determined to get the rest of the kids through the book fair, as some had waited all week for their turn, I had to rely on my volunteers to help get me through the morning. The school nurse, Denise Adams, wrapped my elbow with ice, and tried to convince me to leave for an x-ray. I fully intended to do that, but had to get the kids through while the volunteers were there. No way could I use my arm, or hand at all. Later, Jim took me to urgent care to be checked out. The Dr. seemed more concerned with my other bumps and bruises on my knee and hip, but my only concern was the elbow. After an x-ray showed there was no fracture to the elbow, I was sent on my way with a follow up appointment in a few days. However, because of the bad weather conditions, it was 2 weeks before I could see the Occupational Health Dr. at Adena. For the next few months, it was found that I had a rotator cuff tear, and injuries to my elbow and bicep muscle. I also had a dislocated shoulder which showed new tears in my 2nd MRI. The pain was excruciating, but I've never been able tolerate pain medication for more than a couple of days, so had to "tough it out", along with ice, and daily therapy exercises trying to keep me from freezing up. The hardest part was learning to brush my teeth with my left hand. I couldn't sew, quilt, craft with polymer clay, fix my hair, cut up vegetables, open lids, drive, etc. for months. In April, I saw my 1st surgeon who without much examination told me surgery was the only option. Didn't like that at all, so made an appointment with a group of orthopedic surgeons in Cincy who are well respected. After extensive probing, exams, and therapy treatments, they too felt it was the only option, and I planned on waiting until school was out before having the surgery done. At work, I modified everything. Since I couldn't use scissors and tape to make book repairs, those had to be left for volunteers and other library staff to help. Jim made a higher box for the computer keyboard, and I taught the kids how to hold the book over to me so my left hand could scan the books. Jim came in when needed to help clean shelves or anything I had trouble doing. Never once did I consider just not coming back to work, although it was discussed each time I visited the Dr. I always said, "Just tell me what I can't do, what I need to do, and I'll do it." By the end of the summer with lots of excuses, I was finally told by Workman's Comp that my surgery was denied. The main reasoning was that their main function is to get the employee back to work, and since I didn't take off work, their job was done. Their Dr. disagreed with my 3 doctors' diagnosis, the MRI's, and the radiologist-all without ever talking to me or an exam. All this time, my elbow which still caused me the most pain, and restricted me long before my shoulder felt it, had been put on the back burner until the shoulder was resolved. I could go on and on. The first year I couldn't travel to visit my girls, grandchildren, and Texas family as I had always done, didn't go on vacation, didn't attend other family weddings, and functions. I rarely went to dinner, as it was very difficult cutting up food while sitting, and my arm ached continually while hanging. At school, I kept it propped on the box Jim built while working. At home and in the car, I used pillows for propping. In a pinch, I use my purse. I'm still propping up my arm each night, and having to rearrange it several times throughout the night to lessen the pain when it's moved during sleep. This year, I've slowly started doing some sewing, and quilting again, but in September started using photography as a fun craft that I can do. Hated learning to use the screen instead of a viewfinder, but that allowed me to keep my elbow at my waist while watching for the right moment to snap. Now I can't imagine any other way to use a camera. Photography has brought plain old fashioned joy back to me after a difficult 2 years. Had it not been for my elbow and shoulder injuries, I would never have taken the time to learn (Thanks, Doris). The great news is...and the real reason for this blog post, they've finally approved my surgery. Friday is the day I'm to be repaired. Never dreamed I'd ever be happy about a surgery. Had to act quickly as the approved time period for the surgery was Jan 1st -April. Of course, the approval wasn't given until mid February, but this time I know I can't wait till summer. That too is probably a good thing, because Dawn and Luke are expecting a little girl (just found out the sex yesterday) in July. I want to be able to hold her, as I wasn't able to do with Christina and Michael's little Isabell when she was born. Even with all the frustration of this, I've always known how truly blessed I am that I can be fixed, that I can live a joyful life. Many others are not so fortunate.
I love food, and as soon as I settle down at night, I can't wait to get up for breakfast. Which is why I get it ready the night before. You know how it is, I don't want to wait. Of course, it has to be nutritious and tasty. Not either without the other. My favorite is a mixture of cereals, nuts and fruits. Shredded wheat, barley nuggets, old fashioned oatmeal (not cooked), walnut pieces, and cinnamon & ginger. This I put together the night before. In the morning I add skim milk, cranberries (dried or canned), handful of grapes cut in half, and a half a banana diced. Then I take my cereal downstairs to upload a photo or 2 on flickr while I savor my breakfast. Yes, I'm smiling the whole time. Like I said-I love to eat. Commenting on some of the flickr contacts (mostly wildlife enthusiasts) gets me going and ready for the youngsters I'll be seeing shortly. Now when they're checking out their non fiction books of interest, and ask about spiders, snakes, etc., I can show more pics in those last 5-10 minutes before library class ends. Since some of you enjoyed my soup recipe, I thought you just might enjoy my favorite breakfast. Funny, though, none of my girls seem interested in trying it. Oh well, they do like my soup. 
Lisha & Dawn recently celebrated their 33rd birthday, and it got me thinking of how blessed we have been with them. With them being preemies, and having a few complications, I kept taking them to a pediatrician in Portsmouth instead of a GP in town. We all have faith in the experts, and many times never question their diagnosis and advise on treatments. It was a mistake I made, as well. Both girls were behind in their development compared to their siblings, as expected in being 7 weeks early. Having an identical twin, though, helped me to see where they should be. Lisha began sitting up around 9 months, Dawn still couldn't at 24 months. Each time I questioned the Dr., he would answer the same, "One twin is almost always slower to catch up, but she will". She also had bent legs, and couldn't straighten them which worsened as time went on. Still when questioned, it was the same response. Finally, when going to Dr. Schlie for my bronchitis and having the 4 girls with me, he looked at Dawn and said, "Do you realise Dawn has Cerebral Palsy?" I was floored. He then advised me to take her to Children's for an evaluation. At that visit, Dawn was seen by 7 specialists (an all day visit). They confirmed Dr. Schlie's diagnosis, and really offered very little hope for improvement, only tried to prepare me with what to expect. During the 70's there was a therapist from Columbus that came to Chillicothe one day per month. However, they didn't recommend it. They told me of some surgeries she would face at different intervals to make things easier. Needless to say, I was devastated. When I returned home, my first thought was, "Well, her calf and thigh muscles weren't developed as Lisha's were, so I will hold onto her arms, and we will all walk every evening." At least I can help her to be stronger, and help her legs look more developed, as people were already comparing her to her twin. Next, I decided to find out everything I could on brain injuries (which is the cause of Cerebral Palsy), so that meant many hours at the public library. I was astonished to find stories of severely injured patients, who did get therapy, and could learn to first move in the water, then crawl, and even walk again. These were adults as well as children, many who sustained their injuries in automobile accidents. That's all I needed to prod me on. The walking continued, and we also began sitting cross legged on the floor (to stretch those muscles and hopefully prevent the hip surgery that was on the list to be done). I didn't want Dawn to feel any different than the rest of us, so we all sat this way. Dawn, of course, had to be propped up with pillows on both sides, and with her back against the sofa. Within a few months, Dawn was able to walk while holding onto one of my hands. I decided against braces on her legs, because I didn't want her dependant on them (another thing I'd read). It was an option we could have chosen later, if needed. Over the years, I had to come up with a lot of creative ways of doing things so that Dawn would be stronger and develop, and would not feel "different". However, kids are cruel, and during her school years, the one way kids could tell them apart was because "Dawn walked funny". She also had to wear special shoes (boots) at times, because of injuries to her achilles (spelling?)tendons. Dawn excelled in school, and played in sports and cheerleading. All of this made an impact on all of us in one way or another. For Dawn, it may explain why she absolutely did not want to walk down the aisle at her wedding this summer. Well she did, and did it beautifully. Dawn will always have to deal with her motor development, and keep up with her exercises, but God has truly blessed us. Now, back to Lisha who was developing normally, although slightly behind in her first year or two. She did, however, have a white patch completely covering her pupil area in one eye. You guessed it-for 2 years, every time I asked the Dr. about it, he'd say, "Don't worry, it will go away on it's own." He was right, by the time she was 3, it had gone away. When I enrolled the girls in Kindergarten, I was told, "Did you realise Lisha is blind in one eye?" Shock! Once again, I was advised to take Lisha to Children's for an evaluation. They discovered such a thick series of scar tissue over her eye that even lasar could not remove it. After questioning me, they told me she'd probably had a scratch from birth that had become infected. Because it had never been treated, the scar tissue kept building over top of scar tissue. She does have some peripherial vision in that eye, but they're still unable to do surgery to correct it. I guess, I just want to say, many things happen every day that we have no control over, but we each have common sense, and the right to question. Don't ever feel that you have to accept what doesn't feel right, and even if it does make sense. We have to be our own advocates for good health for our families. Sometimes, it can change the outcome, and sometimes, it can just help us to learn what we can do to make it better. Once again, I know how blessed we all have been, and how blessed we are today.
